I don’t really remember the day, but I remember the feeling. It was a beautiful spring afternoon. I remember having unstoppable pressure, so I decided to take a break and go for a ride. I called my friend and we drove around the city with no exclusive destination. I remember that sunset. Those shades of yellow combined with little sparkles of gold. I remember the tall palm trees that adjusted their rhythm to the soft wind. As we waited for the traffic lights to go from yellow to green, an idea popped into my heart. I never really wanted to learn to drive, but suddenly I felt that urge to explore.
My curiosity never was a big positive trait of mine, but in situations like this it brought life into my veins. My friend taught me the basics and at first it felt like all the power in the world was in my hands. The moment I had to turn left the power disappeared and I felt like chaos was ruling with my brain. The lack of control and the control were on a same level. Nothing so opposite can coexist, but at this moment it kind of did. It was a different experience, really, different from anything I ever felt. But paradoxically, similar to one particular feeling.
When I got home, I got to thinking.
Learning to drive was actually the same thing as learning to live. We don’t really know what we are doing, we just sit, put our seatbelts on, and wait for a sign. We are given a procedure, from people who done that before, but we don’t really listen to it, until we have to start doing it. We make mistakes, and we pay them off in time. We sometimes have accidents that are not our fault, but we participate in them. We are sometimes hurt, but we learn to get back up and keep driving. We sometimes make a wrong turn, just so in the end we realize it was the right one all along. We do not actually realize it until we see some beautiful landscapes we never knew existed before.
That is the moment when we say to ourselves that it is the journey, not the destination. If we are lucky enough, we have an amazing person sitting next to us through thick and thin, pointing out our mistakes just for our own good, then laughing about a stupid joke we read on Instagram a few seconds later. The thing is, in life we do not always get the signs so obviously, we do not always have a seat belt.
We do not always have a traffic light to tell us when to stop and when to continue. But in life, we get the mystery, we get the excitement, we get the unpredictability. We get everything that helps us feel alive.
I still can’t remember the day. But I remember the feeling. It was so soothing and simple. Different, but similar. Just like life itself.